Last week I started providing questions so that you can work through Bob Kauflin’s outstanding parenting message, “The Pastor and His Older Children.”  In my care group this past week, we covered the section entitled “Focus on the heart – yours and your teens.”  It runs from 22:00 – 59:00 in the recording.  (You can download the message here.)

I would encourage you to review that section and then discuss the following questions with your spouse:

1. What was encouraging or helpful to you from this section?  How was that point helpful to you?
2. Bob reminded us that our hearts are inherently deceived about ourselves (see Heb 3:13), including our parenting, and that makes it imperative that we not hide struggles or challenges we’re facing in our parenting.  Is there anything in our parenting (or any situations with our children) that you’ve been tempted to hide from others?  I.e. – any issues that you are hesitant to share with others?  If so, what?  Why do you think you have been hesitant to share that?
3. In focusing on our own hearts, Bob points out how Col 3:21 (“…do not provoke your children lest they become discouraged”) implies that we can parent in a way that provokes and discourages our children; for instance, we can say the right things in wrong ways.  What are some ways that I am (or might be) provoking our children, tempting them to discouragement?  What heart-level issues (what I’m thinking, wanting, craving, worshiping) in your own heart might be leading to that pattern of provoking?
4. Bob mentions that an awareness of the heart should cause us to excel in encouragement rooted in the gospel.  Given that, what are our children more aware of: our encouragement or our correction?  (Please ask your children that question to find out what they would say.)

Grateful for you!

Tab

The next growth group will meet on Jan. 9 at 8:00 a.m.

The assignments are:

• Chapter 16 (Resurrection and Ascension) in Grudem
• Re-read Chapter 3 in Worldliness
• Memorize 1 Corinthians 15:1-4
• Bible/prayer update

Yes, I know; it’s shocking… a blog post!  I admit that I’m not much of a blogger. I had hoped this blog might serve as a vehicle for both communication and care.  So far it’s been a regular venue for communication but not much care.  In hoping to extend more care and help, I wanted to let you know about a message by Bob Kauflin entitled “A Pastor and his Older Children.”  We’ve been covering it in my care group, and it is an outstanding message!

It’s a message I would recommend for all parents, and not just pastors.   You can download it here.  Click here for the outline.

To serve you in applying the content of this message, I thought I would give you (this week and in the coming weeks) the questions we’ve used to discuss this message in my care group.  We’re covering this message by sections, and the first section is entitled, “Parent with God in the Picture” (time markers 3:15 to 22:00).  Consider listening to that section and then discussing with your spouse the following questions:

1. What are some ways you see God at work in our parenting?  How are you encouraged by seeing His work in that way?
2. Bob said that one of the main issues is that we forget that God is in the process of parenting.  Is there a way (or an area) in which you frequently forget that God is at work in our parenting?  If so, please explain.  How does forgetting his work in that way affect your parenting or how you relate to our children?
3. Bob notes that keeping God in the picture cultivates a fear of God (point A.).  Given that, are there ways you find yourself motivated by the fear of man in your parenting?  If so, what else do you think that might be revealing in your heart?
4. Bob quotes Charles Bridges who wrote, “It is faith that enlivens our work with perpetual cheerfulness.  It commits every part of it to God, in the hope, that even mistakes shall be overruled for his glory…”  Where in our parenting is there a pattern of “perpetual cheerfulness”?  Where in our parenting do you typically lack “perpetual cheerfulness”?   How can we pursue others to help us cultivate faith for that area?

With you in this holy task of parenting!

Tab

Join us this Saturday for Christmas caroling in the neighborhood around the church! We’ll also invite those in the neighborhood to our Christmas series. Meet at Plank Jr. High at 6:30 p.m.

Note: We recommend that you bring a flashlight, so that you can see the song lyrics while caroling.

After the caroling and outreach, we’ll gather at the Trainor home for hot cocoa.

On Saturday, December 5, we will have an Age of Opportunity meeting for parents at 7:00 p.m. at the Trainor home. We will listen to and discuss the message “Emerging Convictions in a Changing World” – part two of a series on parenting in the middle school years.

Growth group meets this Saturday, Dec. 5, at the Trainor home at 8 a.m.

The assignments are:

• Chapter 3 in Worldliness
• Chapter 15 (The Atonement) in Bible Doctrine
• Bible/prayer update
• Review Psalm 19:7-11 and 1 John 2:15-17

Also, we have some NEW dates for 2010 growth groups:

• Jan. 9
• Jan. 30
• March 6
• April 3
• May 8
• June 19

I’d like to make you aware of a seminar on college choices held earlier this fall at Covenant Life Church.  You can listen to the recordings of the seminar by clicking on the links below.

College Choices Seminar Part 1

College Chioces Seminar Part 2

College Choices Seminar: Q & A

Thanks to everyone who was able to make it to last Saturday’s corporate meeting; I hope you enjoyed our time together as much as I did!

Because we don’t record these meetings (just to keep the set up as simple as possible), I post my notes from the message. Click here to download those notes.

Also, below are the discussion questions and fellowship points from the meeting.  Thank you, parents, for discipling your teens in these ways.  It’s our privilege to support you in any way that we can!

Tab

DISCUSS – with your discussion group

1. Let’s go around the circle so that everyone shares. What was most helpful to you from this message?  How was that helpful for you?
2. How should seeing the “character” of God’s word help you?  Are there ways that you could trust God’s word more?  Please explain.
3. How should seeing the “consequence” of God’s word help you?  How does seeing that motivate you to feed on God’s word?  What will be your plan to do so?

APPLY – in fellowship with your parent(s)

• The Encouragement Point (for parents to ask):  As your parent, the areas where I’m most encouraged about your intake of God’s word would be… (be as specific as you can)
• The Application Point (for parents to ask):  For your answer to question #2 above, how can I help?
• The Input Point (for youth to ask):  As my parent, how would you like to see me benefit more from God’s word in my life?

For those who have signed up to participate in the meal-packing event for the Hope4Haiti service project at 4 p.m. this Sunday, here is information about the location.

The service project will take place at:

Bright Hope International
2060 Stonington Ave. #100
Hoffman Estates, IL  60169

Directions from our area:

1. Take IL-59 north for about 20 miles.
2. Turn right onto IL-58/Golf Road.
3. After about 2.5 miles, turn left onto Barrington Road.
4. After about 1 mile, turn right onto Hassell Road.
5. Turn left onto Stonington Ave.

If you have any questions, please contact Mike Wiersema.

At our six14 parent + youth meeting this Saturday, we will begin a series on Scripture with a message from Psalm 19, “Savoring Scripture.”  Please plan to join us at Plank Jr. High at 6:14 p.m. (snacks will be available at 5:30 p.m.).