It was great being with you, youth and parents, this past Saturday! I hope you found our time together helpful on this important, but sometimes difficult, topic of guy/gal relationships. If you weren’t able to be there, or if you’d like to review this message, you can find my manuscript for the message here.
Here are a few other points we made from our meeting. First, I would recommend that parents read and determine an appropriate time to discuss with your youth the book I Kissed Dating Goodbye. It’s a very fine book, but I think it’s helpful to remember that Josh’s point in it is to address what we might call “worldly forms of dating” – patterns and habits of relating in which God’s word isn’t clearly obeyed or applied.
As we discussed, the issue here is not terminology – i.e., dating vs. courtship. It really isn’t that important what we call a given relationship, but it’s absolutely crucial that we’re seeking to apply biblical principles in that relationship. In leading and discipling our teens in this area, it’s vital that we seek to build biblical convictions in their lives for this area. Specifically, we must build biblical convictions for at least the following categories:
- purpose (as in the purpose of relating being to discern if marriage is in the future)
- purity (a crucial arena for parental discipleship)
- parents (and their vital role in their authority and their wise counsel for the teen’s life)
To help us build those biblical convictions, I would highly recommend a parenting seminar recently given by our friend Kenneth Maresco at Covenant Life Church. It’s called “Parenting Ages 15 to 18” and you can find it here. Part 3 in particular addresses this issue of relationships, and you will hear many points that I gleaned from our good friend Kenneth.
I hope these brief thoughts are helpful; if you have any questions at all, please do let me know. I’m happy to try to serve you in any way that I can.
Lastly, below you’ll find the discussion questions I provided. Please consider using questions like these on a regular basis to care for and disciple your teen in this important area.
Grateful to walk alongside of you in this holy task of parenting!
Tab
DISCUSS – discussion questions for parents and youth
- What questions would you have about this area/topic?
- What was unclear for you from this message? What do you find you agree with? What are you not sure about?
- Do you feel comfortable in talking with me about this area? How can I make it easier for you to talk with me about this?
- How are you doing in this area of your life? Are there “interests” you’re having or thinking about?
- What truths or passages from God’s word could or should shape your thinking there? Let’s talk together about that, and walk together in that!
