It was great being with so many of you last Saturday night! I hope you enjoyed our time together as parents and youth as much as I did. I thought it might serve if I recapped our time by taking the message I gave and making three blog posts out of it. I hope doing so serves you as you “continue the conversation” with your youth, helping them to understand and apply what we talked about. Here are the fellowship points I suggested to continue the conversation:
- The Encouragement Point (for parents to ask): As your parent, the ways in which I’m most encouraged about how you influence others for godliness would be…
- The Application Point (for parents to ask): Which of these three areas (reach out, encourage, correct) is most difficult for you? How can I help you with that area? What do you think specific growth looks like that you might care for others more in the ways we’ve discussed?
- The Input Point (for youth to ask): As my parent, what concerns or questions would you have about the ways I do or do not influence others for godliness?
Click below to continue reading the introduction and point one from Saturday night…
We are continuing our series called “My Peers.” We began by talking about the reality of how we are influenced by others from Proverbs 13:20 (“Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm”). So we began with how we are easily influenced, and then we started talking about how we can be a positive, godly influence on others. To that end, we asked this question: are you a thermostat or a thermometer?
Because a thermometer does what? It measures the temperature. But what does a thermostat do? It sets the temperature, and that’s what we want to be like: spiritual thermostats, not thermometers – influencing others for a love for the Savior. So, last month we talked about the heart we must have if we are to be a godly influence on others, as we saw from Simon the Pharisee and the sinful woman in Luke 7. From her example, we learned from Jesus that those who are (and realize that they are) forgiven much will love (Him) much.
And that’s our main point tonight: Out of a heart of love for the Savior, we seek to help others to grow in their love for the Savior. Here’s the first way we can do that…
1. REACH OUT
Philippians 2:3-4 Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. “In humility count others more significant than yourselves” in verse 3 – and then he elaborates: look not to your own interests (which is what we all do naturally – right?). Look not to your own interests – but also to the interests of others. And then Paul tells us why; read on with me in verses 5-9: Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name.
Do you see what he’s saying? Be like Jesus and count others more significant, because Jesus did that for us – didn’t he? He did not count his equality with God – his eternal glory – something to be clutched, or held on to, but laid aside his splendor as God the Son and took on a human nature that he might die for our sins. That’s humility and servanthood of the highest degree – the humility and servanthood of the cross. And we can never match that, but we are to emulate it. For all who believe, for all who have turned from their sins and trusted in the Savior – they are forgiven of all their sins, they are put in a right standing with the God of the universe, they are empowered to live in newness of life. And they can now emulate this humility and servanthood by counting others more significant – looking to others’ interests, and not just our own.
There are many ways we could apply that, but right here for us (in this context) one crucial way to count others more significant than ourselves is to reach out. Specifically, reach out to those you don’t know or don’t know well. Reach out to those who maybe have fewer friends here or are just newer here. That’s godliness, isn’t it? That’s a practical way of emulating the Savior – reaching out to others, taking an interest in others as a way of prioritizing their interests above our own.
You see, we want to have a youth culture that isn’t built around cliques, but it’s built around the Lord Jesus Christ. We want to have a parent-youth ministry that doesn’t have the youth bunching up in small groups of friends and never looking outside of themselves – never counting others more significant than themselves. I’m not saying it’s wrong to see friends or that it’s wrong to enjoy your friends; I’m not saying that at all. Those are good things, but how often do you reach out beyond that circle of friends to those you don’t know or don’t know well? How often do you include someone that isn’t your closest friend? How often do you reach out to someone that maybe is very different than you – they have different tastes, different preferences, different personality – but they’re in Christ with you… how often do you reach out like that?
Let’s see that the example of Jesus – his not counting eternal glory as something to be grasped – that calls us to prioritize the interests of others, and one way we can do that is by reaching out to others. And that really is a way not only to demonstrate godliness, but to influence others for godliness. It’s a way that, out of a heart of love for the Savior, we seek to help others to grow in their love for the Savior.
Kenneth Maresco could tell you stories of reaching out to me at a singles ministry dinner, and he would tell you that I was painfully quiet. Painfully quiet! I probably didn’t talk to anyone unless they asked me a question, but Kenneth and others reached out to me and that continued for years: people reaching out to me, taking an interest in me and helping me to grow.
Scholar D.A. Carson tells of how his mother encouraged him to do this: “When I was in my mid-teens and going through a phase when I wanted to pull away from meetings both local and regional because (I pouted) those who attended didn’t have my interest(s), and they all cared about themselves, and more of the same, my mother, sitting quietly at her treadle sewing machine, quietly quoted two or three proverbs, and then added, ‘He who would have friends must show himself friendly. At the next meeting, before you go into a sulk, look around for the loneliest person in the room, and go and find out everything you can about that person. Then find the next loneliest person and do it again.’“
That’s a good idea. At the next meeting, or even this meeting, look around for the loneliest person in the room, and go find out everything you can about them. Ask them as many question as you can think of – and then go to the next person. Wouldn’t that please the Lord – as we reached out that way!! That’s the first way, as thermostats and out of a heart of love for the Savior, we seek to help others to grow in their love for the Savior.
